冥想

不知不觉

渐行渐远了几个星期

家  还爱我吗   会想我吗

自以为从一个深渊里爬了出来

谁知又跌进另一个泥泞

不被祝福的爱情

看不到结局

却假装相信爱情

————————————————————

到底自己做错了什么

为什么这么讨厌我

注定这辈子

得不到家人的爱

难过

前途颠簸不平

害怕

你说会牵着我的手

一起突破

能吗

语塞

Kampar 12/6/13

*Our lovely Corner of the Room*

我爱把房间弄得古里古怪

好像长不大的孩子

还好他也是一样 =P

*燕窝豆腐花*

今天是端午节

宝贝知道我会想家

然后一直帮我找粽子

找了整个Oldtown

一个粽子的影子都找不到 >.<''

连我都放弃了

可是宝贝说

“没到最后不可以放弃， 最后买不到， 带你上怡保找”

听了这句话..

好感动

然后我们去吃豆腐花 *.*

终于！！

宝贝的努力有了结果~

在己子当归鸡饭店

一位好心的阿姨送了一粒给他~

感动 x2

打开粽子吃~

幸福的感觉~

满满的~

打开粽子

好香好香！！

虽然会想念家里的粽子

可是已经很满足了^3^

谢谢你这么爱我的宝贝！

••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••••♥••

Back to Kampar (1)

金宝Kampar的天空

2013年6月8日

经过7个小时的车程，又回到了鸟不生蛋的金宝。

心情百般复杂...

既熟悉又陌生的环境..

好像好多都变了..

只有牛屎还特别多。

2013年6月9日

9个月纪念日..

没有想过会怎么庆祝..

因为我们的Little Orange生病了.. =(

很惊险地知道我们是冒着生命危险来到目的地...

还好没发生什么事

真是不幸中的大幸了

*Grill Chicken chop + Grill Fish with Lobster Sauce*

我从来没有在Secret Recipe吃过这些...

吃了一口那个龙虾酱的鱼扒..

就赶紧跟宝贝换他的鸡扒来吃了>.<

本人真是接受部来那个腥味~

不过鸡扒的酱汁不错..

只可惜肉质太硬了~

*真的很讨厌Baby Face 的他*

*超重的眼袋*

最后来了一片Original Cheese Cake..

好像奢侈了一点..

不过幸福的

（想到家里..T____T) 

最近陪着他上学放学

总会情不自禁想起之前的生活..

甚至会怪自己没好好读书

不过说真的

UTAR多了好几栋楼...

可是天气..

还真是吓死人的热~~ 

每天要被他宠坏了

带我吃这个那个

不知道变成母猪

他还会要我吗

>__________<

某个路边 LOK LOk

说真的  比另外一架讨人厌的UNCLE Lok Lok 好很多

吃到最后 甚至省了一毛钱

谁叫我家的笨蛋

数学都算错

=.=''

不过那个Uncle够Nice的

还会去支持他吧~

哈哈！

可怜的 Little Orange 进医院了

花了好多医药费... >.<

但今天够Lucky

那个人少算钱

呵呵呵！

那个人够倒霉的

不过我们赚到就好~

中Toto的心情~

**保佑他们不要发现才好**

最后一夜

最后一夜　情绪零碎

回忆充斥着即将饱和的脑细胞

强忍着泪水　　拖着沉重的步伐

不知从何开始　　　也不想知道从何开始

不想去接受事实

可以吗

雨好大．．．心好冷．．

寂寞

害怕一个人

害怕寂寞

尤其害怕自己

伤害你

我爱你

宝贝

Our Journey Together*

A journey for two person,

A path of life together hand in hand,
A path of faith together heart with heart,
A journey life long living faithfully by each other,
An endless journey of love <3

There may be fears in each journey,
There may be problems in each move,
There may be spikes in each step,
There may be nails on each road,

But never fear my dear,
There will be me to chase your fears away,
There will be me to solve each problem we come across,
There will be me to sweep each step before you take,
There will be me to blunt those nails to pebbles on each road,

Baby need not fear,
For I am here,
My heart is here,
Let me bring you from there to here,
Letting you hear only cheers and laughter of life,
As life is to be happy and wonderful.

It is all poeple's thoughts that made this world look bad,
It is all people's words that made this world seemed bad,
It is all people's perception that made this world corrupt and ugly,
It is all people's disbelieve that made this world cruel and dark...

When the truth is,
This world is all depending on how you see it,
With me,
Positive thoughts will make our world peace and ease,
Nice words will make our world lovely and sweet,
Serene perception will make our world pretty and wonderful as can be,
Strong faith and solid believe will make our world a happy ending one,

As you can see the comparison between good and bad,
Look forward in a great and wonderful life than to ponder at a dark and depressing current state.
The thing about life as I can see it is a lovely and happy one.
Your bibi can live here and erase all my sad memories,
Do you really know why?
Because all those memories here in Kampar in the past do not mean anything else to me..
Honestly, because you are the one I care the most!
Nothing else in this world would matter to me any more!

My times all for you,
There is never a moment my mind is not thinking about you*
It is always and constantly about you..
Everything that revolves in my world is either about you or for you~!!


My dearest baby,
I want to make you the happiest girl in life before 9/9/2017!
I want to make you the happiest women in life after 9/9/2017!
This is because, I will bring you a new life..
A life so much better and will only be better from the moment you live with me..
Dearest baby, I love you always and forever*

两个人的旅行

我喜欢旅行

但没去过哪里

但很快的

我就要开始我和他的旅行了

回到一个即熟悉又陌生的地方

那里曾经装载着许多不愉快的记忆

 

而这次     另一个他将要帮我抚平那些不美好的回忆

别人告诉我   选择了   就要微笑去接受

我很尝试的去接受     但难免有多多的不舍得

回忆太多   埋怨太多    悔恨太多

而心太小

是不是应该敞开胸怀      接受一切的不公平呢

希望像你说的     过了好几年之后

是带着荣耀     而不是伤痕

我怕痛     这次可以不要再受伤了吗？

 

Moving closer as hours pass*

my dearest baby~*
that date that bibi posted and set is the latest date de..
surely can be earlier than that ler..hahaha..well, bibi finished eating and back home ler..
after eat already come back to see baby de posts..
cause bibi know i need to post ler..got feeling ask me go post something..
ahaha..then come back here can see baby de post wor..
but the thing is, it is so complicated that even google translate cannot tell me :(
lolz..baby de mandarin really good le..just like english using lots of metaphors and strong vocabulary..

hmm..guessing that baby feeling would be really mixed up and tensed as well as time passes by..
bibi really love you very much ler..just want baby to be happy..want baby have happiness in life*
there is nothing i want more than happiness for you ler..thats why bibi shifting house and working so hard hope that baby would be happy and no need do so much work ler..muacks muacks*
wan baby to be with me and enjoy life de hor..sayang sayang baobei lots!!

tomorrow got class liao ler..lolz..kinda sad sad need go class ler..
but actually is excited when can go class with my baobei laopo ler..
hahaha..muacks muacks*
bibi really happy de hor..waiting baby to be with bibi ler..
sayang sayang baobei lots~!!
guessing baby is sleeping soft and sweetly yea..
i miss you and i really really wish baby beside me sleeping ler..
cause bibi can hug hug baobei in my arms..
can protect my baby from all harms and sadness in life..
there will only be warmth and happiness in our hearts and lives together..
i love you my dearest baby..left 10 days to be with you liao ler..
this means is lesser than 240 hours liao lor..wow~!!

anyhow, baby dont be sad sad kays..
bibi will be there for you de baobei*
sayang sayang baby~love you!!
bibi will be sleeping liao ler..
sleepy liao for now..hahaha..
really really piggy de bibi yeah..
tomorrow after class would be shifting house again ler..
sayang baby*
guessing within 2 days all will be done already lor..
waiting for baby to be with me!! muacks muacks*

纠结

倒数离开的日子

递交辞职信的那天

百般交集的心情

体会到人情冷暖 

让我不禁想要仰天长叹     

有些人   看似如此的真    却流露出丝丝的假

真伪    让我怀疑起自己是否在游离于虚无缥缈的世界

不曾想过要逼自己成长

总想一天过一天

浑浑噩噩    没什么不好

日复一日的生活    重复的生活节奏

似乎迷失了生活的意义

我为什么而活着

而为了什么来到这个世界

深思....

迷惘未来雕塑未完成的路

那延绵不绝的路

选择    是与非

究竟谁与谁会成为我的过客

究竟破碎的感觉    是不是会随时间而成为过眼云烟

纠结..

Wedding =)

 *Countdown for our wedding 1567days 4hours 55mins 1sec*

Have u check it is a good day for us?? 

COuntdown

Countdown the day to be with u my Dear~

**Happiness**

baby,
this is a song I long wanted you to listen..
I hope baby would know my heart..i really love you~

A change of a life-time, just waiting for you my baby~

to my dear lovely baby,
i know these and recent days you are suffering sadness,

my dear baby,
all i can say for now is just to hope baby hang on..
hanging on there, i will be with you very soon..
taking you away from the sorrow and sadness in life,
giving you a better tomorrow,
one thing you should know about is,
the election asked for ubah, but still failed..
but you can, just follow bibi..
your life will surely change, to be better and best!!

in my heart, all i wanted to give you is happiness and freedom..
away from all of sadness which is conquering you now..
you bibi feels it in my heart..just that i did not tell out to you..
everynight knowing that you need to cry out to release tense,
everytime sweeping floor, you need to cry to release pain,
all these tears and cries, 
makes me more and more wanting to take you away,
all these because i do feel the pain that you are feeling my baby!
its hurting me as well, knowing i am far and could not do anything..
everynight, before i sleep i do 2 things..
1 pray to god, that you will be blessed and freed from sadness..
1 to think and think hard on how to give you a better day!
some nights i cant sleep cause of the topics i cant settle,
such as? worrying you condition and situation there..
i really worry, if there might be something makes you really sad again..
i just wanted baby to leave as soon as you can ler,
so that your life would be recovering from the hurt and wounds of past pains..
bibi really love you..all my heart wanting to give you a change in life..
to be better and happier..
never ever need to scared..

everyday when you wake up,
it would be me, sleeping beside you,
waking together with you ^@^
every meal we have,
it would be me, eating together with you..
every tear that you drop,
it would be me, wiping it away and hugging you..
every smile you make, would be me smiling back at you..

i know that you are very worried about future with me,
but theres only one thing i would really want baby to know..
I LOVE YOU WITH MY WHOLE HEART,
CHERISH YOU WITH MY WHOLE LIFE,
FAITHFULLY TRUSTING YOU WITH MY WHOLE SOUL,
SINCERELY BEING WITH YOU WITH MY WHOLE LIFE~!!

no matter what happens,
i am the one you can rely on,
i am the one who will protect you from all harms,
i am the one who will never ever leaver you in your life,
i am the one who will only love and beloved by you,

just wanting baby be happy,
not baby being sad, suffering and tortured..
cause when you are sad, there will not be a smile on my face..
cause you are my love, my wife, my life..

my family is all ready to receive you,
with their love, you are a part of us,
and we are a part of you, let this be a new life,
for you my dear baby, to be loved,
we do not ask anything for return,
just your sincere heart and love,
our family will be ready to sacrifice for you~!!

dont be sad, just be glad,
you have me, you have my family too~!!
try asking any friends, would their in-law family accept them without conditions?
YES, my mother and father did not ask anything or expects anything..
they want you to be happy with me too..thats all they want..
my dear baby, dont be sad anymore,
the path that makes you sad will end,
at the moment i hold on to your hand and bring you into your new and happy life!

dear baby,
your bibi here loves you for everything you are,
never minding your down points, no one is perfect,
but baby must remember, our love is already reaching its perfection..
we can make our dreams come true,
a fairy-tale happy ending,
your bibi, like prince-charming,
coming all the way from his castle,
to the house which you stay,
and bring you, Germaine (story is Cinderella) back to my palace.
with happiness and life-time loving each other!

baby, anytime you want,
i am always here ready for you*
just want you to be happy, never sad..
dont worry, your bibi is very reasonable and considerable!
i know how you may feel, stressed cause fear and worry..
let me just tell baby, it would be a positive change, and for the best in your life~

i love you my baby,
always and forever,
here, i give my words to you,
as long as my heart beats and i am breathing,
its all my love to you, only you and no one else but you,
Germaine Koh Xin Yi~*

Smile and be happy kays~!

End

每个故事     都会有自己的结局

我亲手为自己谱写了一段走过泪水的内容

而结局是悲是喜     我害怕面对    更不想去知道未来的路怎么走

现在的我    只是个正在逼自己去接受事实的孩子

一个今后将离开家庭的臂膀      带着伤口离开的孩子

第二次     真的是第二次

我踩出这个家     

而这次我不敢奢望有回来的可能

原来在伤口上洒盐

真的很痛    痛得很真实     却又不得已的痛

雨过是真的会有天晴吗

突然..好想你

Sick

Pity me and my babe Kevin are falling sick these few days =(

Hope my Babe Kevin will recover as soon as possible =(

*GOD BLESS*

Exam Exam Exam

今天真是不用睡觉了啦

星期一考试但是我还在偷懒

怎么办啦！！！

我的宝贝可以传染一点“勤劳病”给我吗

我不要懒惰了啦

T^T

报告成绩出来了

啦啦啦~

真是非常感谢我的大恩人

任俊悦猪猪<(@(oo)@)>的帮忙

才让我有不错的成绩

爱你爱你！！

可是我还是需要努力

真的现在这一秒

又怕又懒惰又紧张又小开心^^

♥~大大地谢谢你宝贝~♥

A BIG KISS FOR U~ *MEOW~~*

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

=')

Recently we have go through suffer time...

My heart even urged me to move away from your heart...

Sorry because I am not around u when u r in torture time...

Sorry because I am not strong enough to face those obstacles...

Sorry because I almost breach our promises and leaving u.....

My babe Kevin....

Some of the times...

I hope we can elope to some places that nobody know us...

We can have our happy life together...

Don't need to care about other's perception on us...

We live in our own way...

Our own style.....

But reality is so cruel....

Maybe it force us learn to be grow up ba...

Jiayousss together kay??

I LOVE YOU

Sinking in stress, fighting on for LOVE

Good evening my baby,
How was these few weeks for you?
Guessing it was quite hard and tough yeah..
Same goes to me here as well..
I know baby had been feeling tired and sick of life..
Well, just hand on there..
It is because I know very soon,
When time passes by,
Our happiness will be for us as reward for our;
Patience, Tolerance and Faithfulness throughout these tough times..

Sigh, recently really had been feeling like going through bad luck..
Nothing I do seems right..not even the words I speak..to anyone..
Not just to you my baby, to friends and even parents..
There must bound to be something which makes me in trouble..
Sigh, being barred for the first time..is not something fun..
Rather I am very pissed and unhappy with what had happened..
Really feeling tired of my University life..but I need to continue..
Cause I need to provide a nice and secure future for my baby and babies!!

Tonight,
Bibi came here just to have a short post..
Releasing some of my pressure which i really feel tensed up inside of me..
Every time I try to tell to baby, the timing is really not right,
Recently kept making you sad and disappointed to me as well,
Sigh, really feel really useless, just wish to hug my baby tightly and cry!

Life is tough and life is sad,
I really wish you can be with me,
Physically, is not that you need me or I need you..
We need each other badly..
Just really wish you can be with me now..
There will be so much difference if you are here..
I will be much more productive and focused on my studies,
Cause I know everyday I am happy to be back home to my baby..
Happily passing time together as a young couple,
Learning from each other's mistakes and loving each other more as days pass..



Baby, I really love you,
I am really sorry that I had hurt you unintentionally many times,
I really wish there will be ways to cover back, and yes..
I know how, by treating you the best!
Really really sorry lately let baby found out that I have trouble waking up..
It is because lately I really have a huge problem with sleeping..
Every night no matter what it is,
I will really think till I am too tired then sleep,
Thinking of solutions and how to get my baby away from your sufferings..
Giving you all the best I could ever give..

I want us to be free, a pair of lovely dove,
Symbolizing freedom together as a couple,
I really want baby to just leave and be with me..
I know it may sound hard for you now,
But i really think it would be better,
Making a brand new future together,
Especially starting from scratch,
People will respect and admire us,
Cause we have nothing when we were starting as a couple,
But in the end we both are successful in many ways,
Just believe in future, believe in me, your bibi, your man!

Baby,
I pledge my love to you from the start,
I love you always and forever,
My words meant real and will continue loving you always and forever my baby!!
Well, bibi signing off here, wishing you are just beside me hugging me right now..
I really miss you my lovely baobei <3

Tear

不懂做什么

最近的眼泪特别多

好累好累的时候

好想你能陪我

一个晚上就好

为我充电

充得满满的

为什么人生就像泡泡

一触即破

框住的美好

不能一直陪伴着欢笑

有时候
只怪自己少了那份勇气
就算被丢弃了多少次
还是厚脸皮带着血淋淋的伤口爬回家
不是我长不大
不为什么
就因为我相信
...Home is where the HEART is..

我的心

已深深地长埋在家里的每一寸土地
即使我要走
也希望带着每一份祝福离开
如果你带不走我完整的心
你觉得
我快乐吗

**INCOMPLETE HEART = MEANINGLESS**

Lazy weekend

这两天不懂怎么的....

心情怎样也好不起来....

老公的家人来找他...

我们少联络....

每次都会心情低落...

怎么搞的我...

再加上没有读到书....

考试要到了...

心情也很复杂......

很怕啦.....

拜托自己用功好不好.... =((

Dang Dang Dang Dang

好久没上来了...

原来和我的猪猪在一起191天了...

每天好像都在倒数...

倒数什么时候见面..

什么时候结婚....

什么时候一起变老...

这好像是我们唯一能支持到现在的原因吧？

最近我情绪很不好....

和家人感情不好...

崩溃大哭的时候...

只有你陪我...

我真是个坏女朋友...

还让你担心...难过...跌倒在路边....

甚至还要你离开我..

我知道很自私...

请原谅我嘴硬心软....

其实，

我也是很爱你的 T^T

还有，

谢谢猪猪帮我把报告搞定...

朋友多羡慕我....

有一个英文这么聪明的老公...

呵呵....我也是这样觉得啦....
考试要到了..
真的很担心....
有时在想...
不懂这个选择是对的吗
可是决定了
没有后悔的机会
只可以继续往前走
你会支持我的....对吧

可怜的宝贝老公还在赶报告...T^T
我爱你....<3

*SMILE*

Hello there my dearest baobei laopo,
Bibi just came back from my friend's doggy death le..
Mood now quite sombre ler..
Hmm..missing my dearest baby very very much..
Doing your assignment..keeping delay..
Really really disappointed to myself as well..
Sigh..my dearest baobei, i really miss you..

Today is your big day yea,
Your very first presentation in OUM!
Gambateh and jia you too kays my baobei*
Bibi loves you very very much~*^^

Baby very naughty hor,
keep seducing me to visit baby..
Wuwuwu..i really wanted to do so de..
But, sigh..just cant yet..
Now my heart keep missing my baobei so much,
Remember that bibi said i want to publish a post for baby,
Now i remembered what is it already..
When bibi have the mood bibi will surely make it de..
Love you very very much my baby!!

GAMBATEH and ALL THE BEST, my baobei laopo!!

Diet Diet.....

年过了....

真的真的要减肥了....

暴肥了好多公斤...

不可以再自暴自弃....T^T

6月要到了要见宝贝..

9月要去Annual Dinner...

10月要做伴娘....

到时该不会100公斤吧？？

我不要！！！！！！！

可是可以把嘴巴缝住吗？

好像上辈子饿过一样....

救命哪！！

加油~

明天3月1日

START

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Say LOVE to This....>.<''

Chinese New Year

Finally it was a week holidays for me!!

HOORAY!!

Non-stop eating....Drinking....Sleeping.....

Gain weight T^T

My Kevin said Nevermind Nevermind...

But actually I mind.....T^T

Awe....

Need to control my diet le after new year......

Before that ...

Happy First =P

Muahahahahahahhhahahhaha!!!!

Happy ULALA~~~~

Wish both of us have a prosperous and happy happy NEW YEAR!!